Is Beer Really Cheaper Than Gas?

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 03:01:41 +0000

This seems laughable until you need to go and fill up your tank. I dropped just under $70.00 to fill up yesterday, and the price is still climbing. So lets take a look at gas versus a homebrew and Labatt Blue (I’m a die-hard Buffalo Bills fan and that’s what we drink while tailgating). Enjoy!

2012 Winter Beerlympics

Fri, 17 Feb 2012 02:15:54 +0000

Well this will be brief. I just wanted to give you a quick recap of the Beerlympics from Saturday. Once again we didn’t win. However, we did do pretty well considering we had a teammate bail at the last minute, as well as his alternate. We ended up getting there about 30 minutes before it started and frantically calling everyone we could think of to try and get a fourth team member. I eventually had an announcement made on the mic that we were one short and if anyone was spectating that wanted to play, they should come on down. Thankfully, someone did. I cant remember your name bro, but to the guy in the Miami Marlins hat, good job.

We decided to go to quarters first since it was the closest event. We ended up going 3-1, so a pretty good start. Turns out the team we played lost every event, and that was their last. We then went to flip-cup, which worked out because there wasn’t a line. Funny thing is, as soon as we were ready to play our new partner, lets call him Marlin, went missing. 15 minutes later he shows up complaining about how long the bathroom line was. We all believe the truth to be he was dropping a deuce. We ended up going 3-1 on flip-cup as well, and the one we did lose was crazy close. This would come back to haunt us, as we missed out on the bonus points for a sweep.

So on to the final event, Beer Pong. The wait time was ridiculous. While waiting we did learn of the passing of Whitney Houston, and got to watch some drunkards sing along to the music. We drank a few beers, and waited some more. When we eventually did get called to play, it was almost time to turn in the score cards. I don’t remember the name of the team we played, but two of the four needed a throat chop. I’m not sure what was worse, their stupid f’n dancing between every made shot, or her lack of ability to listen to the rules and follow instructions. We won both games games, one by two cups, and the other by four. Too bad when I turned in our score cards I shorted us by reporting three instead of four; not sure if it would have mattered or not.

So another Beerlympics comes and goes without a trip to the finals. We will be ready for the Summer edition. I need a hookup on t-shirt screen printing if someone reading this knows of someone/somewhere.

A Few Beer Jokes for Humpday

Wed, 12 Oct 2011 20:55:42 +0000

Here are a few jokes to help you survive the week. Cheers!

Beer or no Beer
After the Great Britain Beer Festival, in London, all the brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer.
The guy from Corona sits down and says, “Hey Senor, I would like the world’s best beer, a Corona.” The bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him.
The guy from Budweiser says, “I’d like the best beer in the world, give me ‘The King Of Beers’, a Budweiser.” The bartender gives him one.
The guy from Coors says, “I’d like the only beer made with Rocky Mountain spring water, give me a Coors.” He gets it.

The guy from Guinness sits down and says, “Give me a Coke.” The bartender is a little taken aback, but gives him what he ordered.
The other brewery presidents look over at him and ask “Why aren’t you drinking a Guinness?” and the Guinness president replies, “Well, I figured if you guys aren’t drinking beer, neither would I.”

Free Beer
Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn’t have a lot of money between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of 50 cents. Murphy said, “Hang on, I have an idea.”

He went next door to the butcher’s shop and came out with one large sausage.

Shamus said, “Are you crazy? Now we don’t have any money left at all.” Murphy replied, “Don’t worry – just follow me.”

He went in to the pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness and two glasses of Jamieson whisky.

Shamus said, “Now you’ve lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven’t got any money!!” Murphy replied,

“Don’t worry, I have a plan. Cheers!” They downed their drinks.

Murphy said, “Ok, I’ll stick the sausage through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth.”

The barman noticed them, went berserk and threw them out.

They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk all for free. At the tenth pub, Shamus said, “Murphy, I don’t think I can do any more o’this. Me knees are killin’ me!” Murphy said, “How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third pub.”

Sea of Beer
Two men were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a burning freight vessel. While rummaging through the boat’s provisions, one of the men stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a Genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of the castaways, one did come forth. This particular Genie, however, stated that she could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving much thought to the matter the man blurted out, “Make the entire ocean into beer!” Immediately the Genie clapped her hands with a deafening crash, and the entire sea turned into the finest brew ever sampled by mortals. Simultaneously, the Genie vanished to her freedom. Only the gentle lapping of beer on the hull broke the stillness as the two men considered their circumstances. The other man looked disgustedly at the one whose wish had been granted. After a long, tension-filled moment, he spoke: “Nice going! Now we’re going to have to pee in the boat.”

No Bait
Having arrived at the edge of the river, the fisherman soon realized he had forgotten to bring any bait. Just then he happened to see a little snake passing by who had caught a worm. The fisherman snatched up the snake and robbed him of his worm. Feeling sorry for the little snake with no lunch,he snatched him up again and poured a little beer down his throat. Then he went about his fishing. An hour or so later the fisherman felt a tug at his pant leg. Looking down,he saw the same snake with three more worms in his mouth…

Female Hormones
Yesterday, scientists for Health Canada suggested that men should take a look at their beer consumption, considering the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women. To test the finding, 100 men were fed 6 pints of beer each. It was then observed that 100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional, couldn’t drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing, and refused to apologize when wrong. No further testing is planned.

Beer on the Job
While most companies refrain from allowing consumption of alcohol on the premises, there are some arguments for changing that policy.
Reasons for allowing drinking at work include:
1. It’s an incentive to show up.
2. It reduces stress.
3. It leads to more honest communications.
4. It reduces complaints about low pay.
5. It cuts down on time off because you can work with a hangover.
6. Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear.
7. It helps save on heating costs in the winter.
8. It encourages carpooling.
9. Increases job satisfaction because if you have a bad job, you don’t care.
10. It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work.
11. It makes fellow employees look better.
12. It makes the cafeteria food taste better.
13. Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they are wasted.
14. Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.
15. Suddenly, farting during a meeting isn’t so embarrassing.
16. No one will remember your strip act at the Christmas Party.

My Wife Left Me
My wife left me… I don’t understand.

After the last child was born, she told me we had to cut back on expenses – I had to give up drinking beer.

I was not a big drinker, maybe a 12-pack on weekends.

Anyway, I gave it up but I noticed the other day when she came home from grocery shopping. The receipt included $45 in makeup.

I said, “Wait a minute I’ve given up beer and you haven’t given up anything!”

She said, “I buy that makeup for you, so I can look pretty for you.”

I told her, “Hell, that’s what the beer was for!”

I don’t think she’ll be back

Cancer
An Irishman named O’Malley went to his doctor after a long illness.

The doctor, after a lengthy examination, sighed and looked O’Malley in the eye, and said, “I’ve some bad news for you. You have cancer, and it can’t be cured. I’d give you two weeks to a month to live.”

O’Malley was shocked and saddened by the news, but of solid character. He managed to compose himself and walk from the doctor’s office into the waiting room. There, he saw his son who had been waiting. O’Malley said, “Well son, we Irish celebrate when things are good, and we celebrate when things don’t go so well. In this case, things aren’t so well. I have cancer, and I’ve been given a short time to live. Let’s head for the pub and have a few pints.”

After three or four pints, the two were feeling a little less somber. There were some laughs and more beers. They were eventually approached by some of O’Malley’s old friends who asked what the two were celebrating. O’Malley told them that the Irish celebrate the good and the bad. He went on to tell them that they were drinking to his impending end. He told his friends, “I’ve only got a few weeks to live as I have been diagnosed with AIDS.”

The friends gave O’Malley their condolences, and they had a couple more beers.

After his friends left, O’Malley’s son leaned over and whispered his confusion. “Dad. I though you said that you were dying from cancer??? You just told your friends that you were dying from AIDS!”

O’Malley said, “I am dying of cancer, son. I just don’t want any of them sleeping with your mother after I’m gone.”

Irish Toast
John O’Reilly hoisted his beer and said, “Here’s to spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife!”

That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!

He went home and told his wife, Mary, “I won the prize for the Best toast of the night”
She said, “Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?”
John said, “Here’s to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife.”

“Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!” Mary said.
The next day, Mary ran into one of John’s drinking buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, “John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary.”

She said, “Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he’s only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come.”

Man Gets Stabbed At A Party…….For Bringing Natural Light

Fri, 02 Sep 2011 02:56:37 +0000

I am all for not drinking shitty beer, but this is ridiculous. I would be lying if I said on multiple occasions back in the day, I didn’t drink several cases of it while playing Fire and Ice. If you don’t know what Fire and Ice is, take a deck of cards and a few friends. You spread the cards out on table face down. Pick a direction, and first person calls fire or ice. Fire if you think the card you are about to flip is red, or ice if you think the card you are about to flip is black. If you get it right, you get to give away that many drinks; get it wrong and you drink that many. So you can see how a few people can run through a case pretty quickly. You’re welcome!

Well here are the details:

Brandon K. Smelser, 25, Valley Falls, is facing first degree attempted murder charges. Smelser allegedly stabbed Christopher Daniel, 22, also of Valley Falls, during a fight in the parking lot of the mobile home court at 1208 Oak in Valley Falls.
The incident began around 12:40 a.m. Saturday when Smelser allegedly took issue with the type of beer Daniel brought to a party. Smelser was allegedly upset that the victim brought Natural Light beer to the party instead of another brand.
Daniel was taken to St. Francis (Hospital) where he remains. Smelser was booked into Jefferson County Jail around 2:30 a.m. where he remains.

International Beer Day

Sat, 06 Aug 2011 03:28:29 +0000

International Beer Day takes place on August 5th, with the goal of bringing the world together in celebration of beer. I personally try to celebrate it at least weekly. It was first celebrated in August of 2008, and was founded in 2007 by Jesse Avshalomov, Evan Hamilton, Aaron Araki, Richard Hernandez, Tyler Burton, and Ryland Hale. It is now celebrated in at least 23 counties. In other words, all the cool kids are doing it. Come on, you know you wanna try it. So grab some friends and head to the nearest bar, pub, brewery, backyard, beer garden, watering hole, or neighbor’s garage and grab a brew or 12.

Four Loko Being Recycled?

Sat, 11 Jun 2011 19:37:39 +0000

I’m sure by now you are at least familiar with the controversy surrounding this beverage; but how many of you have actually had the pleasure/displeasure of partaking in this Satan-in-a-can? Of course, if you haven’t already, it is gonna be pretty hard since it’s been pulled from most shelves.

I personally had a couple of the fruit punch, and the best way I can describe the taste, is a mix between box wine and cough medicine. Its very similar to the old hood favorite, Cysco or “liquid cocaine”. I put two down pretty quickly, mostly because of the horrible taste, and was definitely buzzed. At 12.5% alcohol, its easy to see why. One can is about the equivalent of five beers. This however is not the reason the beverage has been banned. The issue is the fact that along with the high alcohol content, it is loaded with caffeine.

So now that they have warehouses full of a now banned concoction, what do they do? Well it seems Four Loko and other alcoholic energy drinks are being recycled into ethanol and other products. They distill the alcohol from the drinks, and then sells the fuel to be blended into gasoline. The aluminum cans are sold to a recyclers which are then turned around as another beer can in about 30 days.

Just think, you could be driving around in a car running on watermelon Four Loko. This kinda gives new meaning to DUI doesn’t it? Terrible I know, throw tomatoes in the comments.

Alexander Keith’s Introduces Three New Brews to the United States

Thu, 09 Jun 2011 19:22:30 +0000

Famed Nova Scotia Beer Brand, Alexander Keith\’s, Debuts in the U.S.

ST. LOUIS (June 8, 2011) – Alexander Keith\’s announces the U.S. launch of three new brews: Nova Scotia Style Lager, Nova Scotia Style Pale Ale and Nova Scotia Style Brown Ale. The beers are now available in 22 states across the U.S.

The three new Alexander Keith\’s brews are perfect for the adventure-seeking beer lover:

With a deep amber color and brewed with noble hops prized for their subtle, spicy character, the Nova Scotia Style Lager has a crisp finish with an assertive, but clean bitterness.

Brewed with traditional two-row malt for a full, malty flavor, the Nova Scotia Style Pale Ale also includes a fruity, spicy and citrusy hop nose.

The Nova Scotia Style Brown Ale is a classic full-bodied brown ale with hints of honey and caramel, balanced with a fresh hop aroma provided by the addition of cascade hops.

Though new to the United States, the heritage of Alexander Keith\’s traces back nearly two hundred years to its brewery in Nova Scotia, founded in 1820 by Scottish native Alexander Keith. After completing his brewer\’s apprenticeship and emigrating from Scotland to “New Scotland” (Nova Scotia), Keith created what is now one of the oldest beer brands in North America. The Nova Scotia brewery is still in operation today under the leadership of its brewmaster emeritus Graham Kendall.

The three new beers are brewed in Baldwinsville, N.Y., and Alexander Keith\’s will also continue to be brewed in Canada in Nova Scotia, British Columbia and Ontario.

“Alexander Keith\’s brands continue to be brewed under the guiding principles of our founder and the strong sense of adventure found in the people of Nova Scotia,” said brewmaster emeritus Graham Kendall. “The brewery and its brewmasters have been certified under our strict certification program, showing our unwavering commitment to our heritage.”

About Alexander Keith\’s
Alexander Keith\’s brands maintain the quality and heritage first introduced by Alexander Keith himself in 1820. Only the finest barley malt and select hops are used to brew these fine beers, which in the U.S. include Nova Scotia Style Lager, Nova Scotia Style Pale Ale and Nova Scotia Style Brown Ale.

The new Alexander Keith\’s brands will be available in the following locations: AZ, CA, CO, CT, DC, DE, FL, IN, MA, MD, ME, MN, ND, NH, NY, OR, PA, RI, VT, WA, WI and St. Louis (MO & IL).

How to Brew Ginger Beer

Tue, 10 May 2011 19:30:43 +0000

So while I was at work the other day, the movie, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas was brought up. This made remember a quote about Ginger Beer. So I figured why the hell not learn how to make it. In just a few easy steps we can brew a virgin beverage.

Combine 1/2 cup finely grated ginger, 1 cup sugar or 3/4 cup honey, and 4 tablespoons each lemon and lime juice with 1-1/2 quarts water and bring to a gentle boil. Meanwhile, mix 1/4teaspoon baker\’s yeast with 3/4 cup warm water and set aside.(Alternatively, you can use a neutral ale yeast, which is less likely to cause off flavors. DO NOT use brewer\’s yeast from the health food store.

After 30 minutes, remove the ginger solution from heat. Add 3 tablespoons dried hibiscus and 1 tablespoon dried rose flower (available at Botanical.com and some specialty groceries), stir, and let sit for 10 minutes. Add 2 1/2 quarts cold water and strain into a second pot. Stir in the yeasty water.

Funnel liquid into two clean 2-liter plastic bottles to an inch below the cap, adding water if necessary. Seal the bottles and store them at room temperature. When the plastic feels firm (roughly 24 hours later), they\’re ready to blow. Move your concoction to the fridge.

Note: Bottles should be sanitized, and not just well-cleaned. Weird things could grow, along with the yeast if one does not. This is accomplished with either a very weak bleach solution (1 Tbsp/gallon) or any commercially available sanitizer. After sanitation, they should be rinsed.

When temperature is above 65 degrees Fahrenheit, be sure to check the bottles after 4 hours, and about once an hour after that. Failure to check the bottles could result in “gushers.” You don\’t want to be cleaning up your Ginger Beer from the ceiling now, do you? If you leave them to ferment for an additional day or more the beer gets less sweet – more sugar converting to alcohol – and more alcoholic.

DRAFT GLOBAL BEER LOUNGE & GRILL ON TAP FOR DOWNTOWN ORLANDO

Tue, 29 Mar 2011 19:32:07 +0000

DRAFT GLOBAL BEER LOUNGE & GRILL ON TAP FOR DOWNTOWN ORLANDO
– New restaurant-bar-lounge concept opens Thursday, March 31, 2011

ORLANDO, Fla. (March 31, 2011) – An all-new restaurant-bar-lounge concept that takes craft beer to a new, more sophisticated level is set to open Thursday, March 31 on West Church Street. Draft Global Beer Lounge & Grill, located directly across from the new Amway Center, will feature 40 drafts on tap and more than 100 bottled brands amidst contemporary custom-lit furnishings, private sofa seating and a gleaming acrylic bar.

“We’re very excited to introduce Orlando to Draft,” said owner and long-time restaurateur Willie Fisher. “We’re taking advantage of a huge interest in craft beers, but we’re doing so in a more urban, upscale environment. It’s really unlike anything else Orlando has to offer.”

Orlando Mayor Buddy Dyer pointed to Draft as an example of the continued revitalization of downtown Orlando and the fulfillment of the original vision of the Amway Center as an economic engine for neighborhoods west of Interstate 4.

“Dining, retail and entertainment options for our residents and visitors has increased tremendously in Downtown Orlando with more than 150 new businesses opened since the beginning of 2010,” said Mayor Dyer. “We’ve seen impressive momentum on West Church Street with the opening of the Amway Center in October of last year and we expect great things from Draft and the many other establishments in that area. I would like to congratulate Willie and his team and thank them for their investment in our community.”

Draft will serve lunch and dinner Monday through Sunday from 11 a.m. to 11 p.m. from a menu created by Executive Chef Bryce Balluff. Balluff, whose influence can be seen in local favorites like Luma On Park and Funky Monkey Wine Company, also brings experience from the kitchens of Asia de Cuba and Per Se in New York. His Draft menu is an eclectic mix of American fare as well as many specialties: Spring Rolls, Fried Mac and Cheese, Pina Colada Salad and Pork Shank.

“We expect to attract a diverse clientele, simply because of our location,” said Fisher. “We think our menu and ambience will attract the business crowd during lunch; we’ll become a pre-and post-game hang-out for Magic games and other events at the Center; and we’ll also attract late-night patrons looking for a hip, new spot to socialize. We’re ready for them all.”

For more information on Draft Global Beer Lounge & Grill, visit DraftOrlando.com. To book a reservation, call 407.826.1872.

Upcoming Beer Events

Fri, 04 Mar 2011 19:34:36 +0000

I wanted to give you guys a heads-up on two upcoming beer events in the Orlando area. The first is Pub crawl downtown and the other is a craft beer festival in Altamonte Springs.

Saturday	March 12th, 2011 @ 8PM
UNTIL	March 13th, 2011 @ 1AM
WHERE	Downtown Orlando
ADVANCE	$12 (plus tax)
AT THE DOOR	$15 (tax included)

I have not confirmed that this event is on for 2011 yet

last year this was on April 17th from 4 to 8PM at Cranes Roost in Altamonte. Unlimited Beer samples and live music.